When you're done with the GENÉTHPHOBIA investigation (maybe you have it, maybe you don't. Maybe someone you know it? Then share it, immediately!
COMMENT WITH YOUR UNIQUE GENÉTHPHOBIA. Cant wait for your share.
Is it only me? Nah, must be at least 7.3 MILLION out of 7.3 BILLION people.
It's my own made-up phobia (it exists, I believe it does), a diagnosable mental disorder? Well, if you or someone you know experience intense distress when faced with the source of your or their phobia, it can prevent a person from functioning normally and sometimes leads to freak-out-episodes. Is the answer a white padded room without a calendar the answer for the new found phobia, Genéthphobia? Btw, this has nothing to do with spiders and snakes; this is deeper shit!
I bet I have to explain how I got to that term Genéthphobia (you won’t find it in the Oxford dictionary, not yet) This is my own construction of an anti-birthday, irrational, unwanted and disabling fear of a day everybody celebrate; the day when you gave your first breath, the day you don’t want to celebrate and welcome into your life. A list of phobias pop up and there’s a name for every psychiatric condition (referring only to phobia’s, not fall down on the floor and spin conditions), turning to Greek Mythology for the best possible denomination: genéthlia, greek for birthday. You are not crazy. We just need to label what you dislike and add a phobia to it, and there you go, you have a condition you never thought you had. For those not struggling with the Genéthphobia (yes I made up that word, 👏🏻YAY👏🏻. I invented. Im going to propose this to a unstable medical board and a person who struggle to climb the ladder with stockings and peep-toes at oxford. Im worried about the grip of that ladder, never mind the perve's that all of a sudden needs a book in the category where peep-toe is holding om for her life. Maybe this is her break. We all know how you make it to the top in the suit-environment... no ladders, you only need a pair of legs.
There’s millions out there having the same vibe about a birthday. Boy oh boy, the stereotype list is long. Before I start with the list; it was suppose to be a special day today. I didn't feel it because Neuropathic Pain took me down and robbed me of any hope of a happy day. What a dysfunctional start to a special day.
You lost a loved one, your person, your life partner!
Your best half has ignored you for the past 15 days and you winder if he’ll at least start to grow a heart again.
You know you’re time it up with a horrible disease before midlife crisis could hit and you made another b-day
Your life changed radically when a disability hit you when you least expect it. This is my line. 4 years. Everyone is seriously trying to make my day bright and shiny. I love them so much but Im trapped in a body, still millions of question marks that haunt me daily and beg for pain relief many times.
You’re 89 and you feed your partygoers with “Im so blessed with another year, I should've been long gone”. Stop it; you wish you were younger
You have suicidal thoughts that you kept a secret fir a very long time, and you’re birthday come and go and the urge is bigger than a non-birthday day
You are a Romeo without a Juliette or the other way around; or more likely a Romeo without a Romeo. The white horse is still a donkey. You think you’ll make it work and hope the donkey change miraculously to something charismatic. You lost the prince a few months ago, but he’s not the problem; he doesn't even cross your mind. You are driving home with a “Heart” playlist. All I wanna do is make love to you..., and you drive around the block to feel the chorus, to feel your situation because you know you’re getting into that bed on your own.
You’re a youngster and don’t have airtime to at least get into it on social media and text messaging.
You're in isolation. There’s many many reasons why you could be isolated. You wanted off the grid living for such a long time. You have the one globe and a solar panel, birds and maybe some wild animals staring at you crying on the porch you built with your own two hands. Incarcerated maybe? Where’s that joy? Di they do something special? I doubt it.
You are waiting for a call from ONE specific person. Checking your phone 30 times per minute. The. You get the idea or develop the paranoia that your phone might be on silent. Shit, you wish that Steve Jobs made that button bigger with an ON and OFF in braille.
You're home alone when you hit the big 50. Kids are in university and your husband might be fucking around. You unsure about the business trip. You don’t know what to believe
You can still taste the D of divorce. You convince yourself that you might've over reacted and the bastard is not such a bad person. You could've handled the abuse, as long as you aren't alone.
Any other reason that cause you to finish a bottle alcohol on your own and you dance to your favourite tubes you enjoyed in your last year of school while your pets close their eyes with their paws, leave the room or stick their head under a scatter cushion.
Even if the above change, you are still fucked. Its imprinted in your blueprint. Deep, and it was a sore marking made with a flame-res iron. I'ts there. It wont disappear. Pshycologist, a Life-coach, man name it; even a traditional healer cant do the shit. Talking about a spiritual chick that tried cord cutting... you seriously have to be far gone to feel the results.
How serious is a Phobia? Phobias are more serious than simple fear sensations and they are not limited to fears of specific triggers. Despite individuals being aware that their phobia is irrational, they cannot control the reaction of fear. Symptoms may include sweating, chest pains and pins and needles. If that happens to yo on your birthday, (I’m referring to sweating, chest pains and pins and needles, you are seriously far gone…. Then this content won’t be of assistance. You’re talking about serious mental issues and 10 x 2 hour life couch sessions won’t help. Maybe chemical pharmaceutical stuff, don’t go herbal because the results might be fatal)
You get 3 phobias and the anti-birthday phobia, GENÉTHPHOBIA, is a birds fart in a twister when comparing it with serious phobias. You get SPECIFIC PHOBIAS, SOCIAL PHOBIA (which is actually just an anxiety. You choose this one because you just like to carry another label), and AGORAPHOBIA - this is serious shit. You can see it when you look at the word. It has the attributes of arachnida (or is only me that can make that association).
SPECIFIC PHOBIA’S - that’s the one we’re discussing here, GENÉTHPHOBIA, the anti-birthday-clan phobia, is an intense, irrational (hashtag irrational) fear of a specific trigger like seeing your date of birth on a piece of paper, receiving texts, letter and presents. (When you get the present your whole perspective change and the phobia rolls like water off a duck back). These phobias are known as simple phobias as they can be linked to an identifiable cause that may not frequently occur in everyday life. The long and the short is; you have one birthday each year and therefore genéthphobia won’t affect your day-to-day living in a significant way. You just put stress on yourself and the day after your birthday you can look back and say - shit, I’ve been irrational and fucked up yesterday. Why the issue? Why the reaction?
How do I know I have Genéthphobia?
You start to lie about your birthday
You have a few birth dates
You used a permanent marker in your ID book to cover up the month and the day. They year is okay. Most leave the year because the requestor or investigator has an option of 365 days. It’s one hell of a gamble.
You lock yourself up and stay in your PJ’s the whole day
You make sure your yearly leave is taken over the period, somewhere around your birthday so that no-one can make a scene at work
You suddenly fall ill a day before your birthday (and you might go to the extend of going to the doctor, play sick and get a “booked off for 5 days due to poor health” note.
You plan and organise your life around avoiding the cause of your fear. It’s more severe than a normal fear reaction. You sit and ponder and work out a plan for days, working yourself up.
On a SERIOUS NOTE: you have an overpowering need to avoid anything that triggers whatever cause anxiety.
Lets move to the serious stuff, just for interest sake: SOCIAL PHOBIA - This is a profound fear of public humiliation and being judged by others in a social situation. The idea of large social gathering is terrifying for someone with social anxiety. Don’t mix it up with being shy - it’s more serious than that.
AGORAPHOBIA - You are slightly stuffed! It’s a fear of situations from which it would be difficult to escape if a person were to experience extreme panic, such being in a lift or being outside of the home. It is commonly misunderstood as a fear of open spaces but could also apply to being confined in a small space, such as an elevator or public transport for that matter. Can you see why I say you are stuffed? If it’s not big spaces its small spaces.
Physical symptoms when someone is standing face to face with their phobia
Hot flushes or chills
Chest Pains or tightness
Butterflies in the stomach
Pins and Needles
Confusion and Disorientation
Somewhere it has to change. It cant carry on like this!
I’m raving about everything but the cure. We have meds and counselling, but there must be a DIY way…. Let’s dig deep into brain-archives. Somewhere must be something that makes sense. Every year is getting more and more shitty and shittier. I dread my phone the evening before everyone wakes up (because Im a late-riser)
How do you change it? There has to be a way, not to sweep your phobia under the rug, but a way that you can deal with past disappointments and hope and pray that next year will be different and better. Medications? Generally psychotherapy using exposure therapyis successful in treating specific phobias. However, sometimes medications can help reduce the anxiety and panic symptoms you experience from thinking about or being exposed to the object or situation you fear, but do you really want to pop a pill (in this case on your birthday? It’ll need to be a pill that last a good 24 hours… every 3 hours sounds like a lot of work, but if it helps its all worth it because if you’re in the situation, biting your nails; 12 hours for your fingers, 6 hours per hand, and then you have to continue with your feet. 6 hours per foot, 1 hour 20 minutes per toe! After your birthday you’ll have to be working a pretty good job. You’ll receive 2 bills (in your inbox when you’re under the age of 62, and one in your mailbox on the street over the age of 62 (because when you’re over 62 and you have. A birthday phobia might not be the only phobia when you have a whole 62 years of shit that piled up. TWO BILLS: 1. Psychotherapy 2. Physiotherapy aka Mental and Physical help. You have serious problems then.
THE BOTTOM LINE: All of the above is a lot of jabber. Your birthday is your birthday. You live once. You’re only turning 38 once. Make it a special day. It’s not that bad. I don’t have the answers to all the serious problems you might be facing, for real now, when you have serious emotional problems facing days such as your birthday you should go see a professional who specialise in this kind of stuff. A BLOG IS JUST A PIECE OF ART IN THE FORM OF WORDS.
I have my demons, no two ways about it. 2 of the long list is my own:
Being disabled, a paraplegic. It seriously messed up my whole life and until the day I stand up out of this wheelchair, I won’t be able to enjoy anything to the full extend like I use to. My legs has been stolen from me. If I hear there’s a reason for everything I want to throw the fuck up. There’s a handful that allowed to use those words. The rest. Bugger off! Those words makes it worse because I do t get the answer for the reason
Turning 37 was the worst ever birthday. I was ignored for half a month, not knowing if the person that’s suppose to be my everything and visa versa would bother to remember that it’s my special day. 2017 changed my blueprint. If I go back and look at my journal in which I express my emotions I understand why yesterday, my 2018 birthday was not a happy one. It’s there… I won’t forget… I have to work around it because if someone step on you knowing that you’re on the floor already, how deep is deep.
CLING TO THE HAPPY ONES. I don’t do photos, journals or thoughts of my old life, life before the accident, but I had to think about the past, my old-life-past, pre-accident-past. My favourite birthday EVER was on the beach with my dogs; kayak and surfboard. What a day. A day I wont forget, ever. The hot sun bronzing my body and the feeling of gratitude was so overpowering that I yearned for someone to share this special moment with, but in reality, it’s me, only me and a few photo’s I won’t go search for.
COMMENT WITH YOUR UNIQUE GENÉTHPHOBIA. Cant wait for your share.