JACQUES VILJOEN·FRIDAY, JANUARY 8, 2016
My principles and beliefs around “MAKING IT LAST FOREVER or HAPPILY EVER AFTER”
SOURCE - The life of Andre Dercksen & Jacques Viljoen
WE ARE IN IT FOR LIFE, SHARING EVERYTHING, FOREVER
Real-Life “Last Forever’s” are much different from the Fictional “Last Forever’s” all manufactured in our mind. I’m a big devotee of mindpower, visualizations and manifestations of what we live in the divine-intelligence of desire and need for a satisfying, rewarding existence.
I’ve seen, experienced and had an idea of couples that has been in the marriage trenches and they are still laughing, smiling and enjoying life to the amplest. I believe in the following enigmas and I see it in my awesomely rewarding relationship with the love of my life, through living the loving quality of unconditional love that exist in my own.
We are best friends forever
You have to seriously like each other to make it last. Just like you will share every experience with your best friend and share every small little detail of our lives every day. Sometimes our separate days are exciting and other days it’s quite platonic. We want to do everything together and share the experience and every emotion generated through every discovery on our journey and how we perceive as a unit or individually where the share of this makes your association grow into something greater than the concept of the platonic “just being together”.
Merging previous lifestyles
This even includes our style and sense of décor. We had to merge every single aspect of our individual lifestyle former to our consolidation.
Never fight about money
The money and material things is not “mine” anymore, it’s “ours” now. Never let your relationship deteriorate over something as inconsequential as money and materialistic things that cost some scaling sweat before the achievement of success. Never blame a mishap when it comes to money.
Discuss sensitive subjects when the time is right
Take your partners feelings into consideration, but still be very honest about your approaches, mindsets and feelings concerned in your daily episodes.
You will have dissimilar perceptions. Your relationship will have seasons when it’s stronger or when it feels feeble. Whatever you do in early days that makes you laugh together, make time to do those same things for the rest of your life. Share whatever makes you laugh even though your partner does not grasp the humor in the moment. It happens to me quite often. Hahaha!
Every Evening must be date night.
Make sure you keep that feeling of “I can’t wait to see you” for the rest of your life. It’s possible.
We seek to do good for the other person, instead of fighting over “what about me”
I use to be guilty when it came to “what about me”… The experience is one where each partner is giving and serving the other. It’s the most amazing feeling when you get to the point of accepting the receiving and not only giving in life. Our accident forced me to accept receiving assistance in life and love. This was the end-result of being single for such a long time.
We plan forward and compromise
Everybody has their rough spots in life, but if everything is focused on past hard times, else your relationship becomes albatross, lift your head, face and plan your future and commitment. Share your goals and merge whatever you want to achieve or where you want to be in life in 5, 10, 20 or 40 years.
We truly knew ourselves before we were blessed with each other
If we have met 10 years ago, for sure, our relationship wouldn’t have worked. You meet at a junction on your journey when God knows it’s time to share your expedition with the right heavenly-match-made combination of two individuals.
We are as different as a couple can get.
But rather than be irritated by our differences, we revel in them. We find each other’s foibles endlessly amusing, much like watching exotic animals in a zoo. Opposites attract. We’ve got the one full of tattoos and not-clean-language and the other with a clean, boerseun lifestyle and dominee-like. Not a day goes by that Andre makes fun or I make sure I use language that Andre does not like.
We share a common dream.
When couples have that, every bump in the road is on the way to somewhere that matters and we want.
We prioritize each other.
You have a new best friend now, your spouse. Make sure to have “your time” and always, before any decision, discuss this with your partner. It works like a tripwire.
Mind our manners.
Too often we show more respect to strangers than to those we love. For example, use my pet-name in every sentence on a text: “my love, what would you like to have for dinner tonight”, not just “what would you like to have for dinner”!
Affection and touch
We LOOOOVE to have any limb to quickly touch each other. Just a toe when you lay in bed, a hand on a leg in the car, a quick kiss and hug when we walk past each other.
We’re in it for life
You are both going to do a lot of growing up and maturing over the years – you have to stay intimately in touch with each other’s growth over all this time or you end up not knowing the person you chose to be with eternally.